Agenbite of Inwit

First day of NaNo is nearly done.  Had a freak out because I thought what Iwrote was crap, but Kamerreon calmed me down, thank gods.  Successful day all in all :)

November 1st
J.K. Rowling

Mr. and Mrs. Dursley of Number Four Privet Drive Were Perfectly Normal, Thank you very much. (First Line of PS if memory serves)

Our darling J.K. invented Harry on a train ride from Manchester to King's Cross, fully formed.  At the time she was unemployed and had the misfortune of being a Classics major from God-Knows-Where if memory recollects.  Throughout 1990 she wrote in several cafes - not to escape her unheated flat - and within five years she was a multimillionaire.

She managed to do all this without realizing that our Boy-Who-Lived was actually homosexual (read between the lines, people!).  She influenced at least a generation of readers, is the twelfth richest woman in this glorious country I'm currently living in, and has an OBE -- without fully getting inside her main character's head.

Now, I realize that to write such things can be seen as heresy. I'll be the first to admit it.  JKR of course invented Harry so surely she must have known him, even if she decided that Lily Evans was vapid enough to fall for the boy who bullied her misguided best friend from childhood, and Harry obviously has some form of Oedipus complex if he actually does fall in love with Ginny Weasley of all people.  So, the only logical conclusion from my ramblings is that clearly she had no idea what Harry really thought and condemned him to a life within his magical cupboard once he had escaped his Muggle one, or you're just so brilliant that you managed to tap into Harry's true psyche and give your lovely fanfiction readers something beautiful and wonderful to read.

If you can do that and a multi-millionaire storyteller can't, then clearly you have one up on her as you embark on this wonderful month-long journey of pain, which begins today.  Happy writing the beginning stages of Hathiel's youth and may Kathel or Cynfael, or whatever name you decide, thaw her heart and bring joy to all (unless this is meant to be a tragedy, then by all means, I hope Hathiel dies from a broken heart).

Your Tongue and Cheek Mentor who Clearly Has Gone Mental,
me

 

I want to throw out my first 1720 words.  I'm not saying they're not okay.  They are ... they just are prestory.  My fingers just typed the godawful words.  *sighs* oh well.  I think I'll delete them when I'm completely finished and start with word 1721.  They're like a prologue's prologue.  Or whatever.

October 31

Dear Madam:

This is a nice little reminder that you are undertaking to write a very long novel in just over four weeks.  If this is correct, then we would like to inform you that we are holding a place for you at our nice clean institution, in case you find that reality becomes to much for you.  All you have to do to get here is tap your head four and a half times while screaming gibberish at the top of your lungs in a crowded area.  We - or our lovely representatives - will be sure to get you as soon as possible.  If you are confused by this letter then do ignore it.  If you are excited then it's best you go to your local hospital and turn yourself over to our care now.  You're already clinically insane.

Lots of joy and we do hope you get drunk so that a policeman might bring you to us even sooner,

The Men with the Blue Gloves

Fireflies (An AU of 'Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince')

When Harry finally admits to Hermione that he's doing well in Slughorn's Potions Class because of the Prince's textbook, she mentions that the Prince might be a relation to the fourth year Hufflepuff of the same name. After tracking him down, Harry becomes obsessed with him rather than with Malfoy's secretive plans. SLASH.
 

Ten NaNoWriMo points (sorry if this is repetitive, but I want you to complete it.  Imagine me as Buffy the Vampire Slayer in Cheerleader Uniform.  Except a Brunette.  With glasses.  And Better legs.  If you're thinking Cordelia I'll hit you over the head):

1. Have a standard writing time.  This is key otherwise procrastination happens.

2. Write 1,667 words a day if not more.  If you write 3,000 day one, great!  But it still means you should write 1,667 on day two otherwise you won't have a safety net.  What I did the first time round is I opened a new document each day so I could have the word count and then would paste it into a master document.  It's kind of funny looking back on them now.

3. Don't go back and edit.  You may kill yourself and find yourself in the swamp of unfinished novels.  It's a horrible place to be.  I do not recommend it.  You can edit later when all is said and done.

4. I am here to bitch at.  It is my secondary function.  I may not know what to write in response, but I know it won't be personal unless you start insulting my mother (and then I just might agree with you).  Use me as an outlet.

5. This may seem obvious, but it happens: DO NOT SWITCH NOVELS IN THE MIDDLE.  Please, just don't.  Or I may buy a plane ticket to the states and strangle you.

6. You're a newbie.  Even though you've written before and you've published poetry, you're still a newbie.  Enjoy being a baby, and that means don't try to adopt someone else.

7. AIM or some other form of IM system.  Do you have it?  If so, we should exchange.  Ties in with #4.

8. If I drop off the face of the planet - DO NOT PANIC.  I'm not planning on it, but I am in grad school and might have to go live in the library for hours at a time, so if you don't hear from me, just keep on sending emails and I will answer them once my required reading and translations are done.  I also have reading week in a little over a week and if I happen to be out of email range, I'll tell you and send you a bunch of emails with your encouragement all nicely labeled.  If you cheat and open them, it's your fault *sticks out tongue*

9. You will run out of steam at some point.  That's normal.  Don't panic, just pace yourself and sending bitching emails my way.  Pad it with fluff, do what you have to do.  Become a CocaCola addict.

10. Finally, have fun.  That's the point of this.  Even if you think your novel is crap (and there will probably be a few times at 3 am when you do, it's inevitable) - remember that you're doing this for yourself and no one else.

Nothing else to report except that I'm out of bread and avoiding going to the grocery store.  I hate the grocery store.  I have to walk ten minutes to get there and once I'm there, I never know what to buy.  I'm not certain that there's a point to the entire process except that I don't really want to starve.  But I'm drinking tea and have peanut butter if I need it, and I helped some blokes pick up fallen fruit last night, and they gave me an apple, so I have that.  However, I need to wash it first.  It's been on the streets of London, after all.
 

Or perhaps in Slytherin

You'll make your real friends,

These cunning folk use any means

To achieve their ends.



Slytherins are known for their ambition, guile, and Machiavellian sensiblities.